How to Write a Letter of Apology

How to Write Letters



© 2009-2010 Ugur Akinci

Writing a genuine letter apology is a delicate art that can settle a lot disputes right on the spot and prevent further deterioration of an already sensitive situation. I forgot the number of times when a situation got out of hand and ended up either in court or worse just because one or both parties adamantly refused to apologize.

There is an incredible magic in a genuine apology offered at the right time and expressed with the right words. Next time you;re in a conflict, if you honestly feel that you could have acted better, try an apology and see what happens.

Legal Caveat: we're living in such a litigious world that in certain situations the word "apology" can actually carry certain legal obligations. It could be treated as a legally-binding "admission" and that can have certain legal consequences, depending on the specific context. If in doubt, please consult your attorney first.

Follow these steps to write a genuine letter of apology:

1) Write and send your letter right away. Sooner the better. Don't wait for a week or month to send it. Late apology letters lose their authenticity and fail to defuse the pent-up emotions of the other party.

2) Use the word "apology" (with the Legal Caveat mentioned above).

People know the difference between you "feeling bad" about something, or "regretting" something, on the one hand, and flat out "apologizing" for it, on the other.

Most people would not feel that you are apologizing unless they actually hear or read the words "I apologize."

So, if you want your letter of apology really come across as one, don;t mince the words. Don't play linguistic gymnastics. Go ahead and saying, the very FIRST SENTENCE of your letter:

"I apologize for...."

or

"Please allow me to apologize for..."

or "I'd like to take this opportunity to apologize for..."

3) Explain why it was wrong for you to do or say so. Give a recap of the situation you're referring to and help the other person understand that you're genuine in your apology.

4) And lastly, explain how you'd act differently; what you'd do or say instead; or the measures you've implemented to prevent a recurrence of the same situation. The third option can be more appropriate for corporate or business apology letters. For example, if you are apologizing to a customer for an order lost, you can explain the measures adopted to make sure no orders will be lost in the future.

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